| March of the Jezebell Squire |
[Mar. 8th, 2006|01:17 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  dirty | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Stone Temple Pilots | ] |
Sometimes I remember this pathetic little LJ and weep for it. Seldom seen, often unheard - LJ weeps. We all weep.
There was once a mighty war between two great nations. One lost miserably while the other achieved a great victory. The loser? LJ. The Winner? Xanga.
But much like a battered Germany after the first Great War, the cogs of LJ once again begin to turn, building a mighty warmachine to once again challenge the powers that be. Who will win? Who will lose? A peace perhaps could be made? An uneasy balance that could fall at any moment much like the Cold War.
With that said I move onto Phase II.
"What is Phase II?", you surely ask.
Well I am here to inform you. Phase II comes immediatly after Phase I but not after Phase III.
I once knew this girl that used to love to eat candy apples. Candy apples as you all know were banned in the United States in 1953 after they were found to cause cancer in 98 out of 110 lab rats. Later it would be found out that lab rats simply get cancer from apples. However much later it would be found out that lab rats just simply get cancer for no reason.
Have any of you ever had rats? Or hamsters? They seriously get weird tumor things for no reason at all. It's pretty gross and kind of sad. I've personally owned around at least a dozen hamsters, probably more, in my life and I'm pretty sure all of them had cancer. Including but not limited to Testicular Cancer of the Brain.
Pretty gross.
I know.
I said nyga pop the stop don't drop the mop.
Gay.
Fag.
Moose.
I put turnips on the table so they wouldn't rot.
It's been three months since I wrote in this guy. Thought it was the end? Didn't you? Bet you didn't. Did I already mention the three month thing? Not sure.
It's 1:25am.
I watched Jarhead again. I like the movie just fine, but I think I enjoyed it much more the first time.
LJ aka El Gay. So hilarious. What a great pun. I'm such a genius. Wow. I think I'm going to open my wrists. With Leon.
Oh dear, I don't think anyone here knows about Leon.
Leon is a dumb cat. Very dumb. Very friendly. But extremely dumb. I practically hate him. He brings out the worst feelings of annoyance in me. I think he is some sorta demon sent to twist the hearts of men.
I guess...
Not really sure.
This is overall pretty gay, and quite long. I think I am quitting now.
The End. |
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| Bodunks |
[Dec. 2nd, 2005|06:25 pm] |
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Christmas time is here again. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 21st, 2005|12:55 am] |
| #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### | Your personality type is RCUAI | You are moderately reserved, calm, unstructured, moderately accommodating, and intellectual, and may prefer a city which matches those traits.
| | The largest representation of your personality type can be found in the these U.S. cities: Washington DC, Oklahoma City, Raleigh/Durham, Louisville, New Orleans, Greensboro, Austin, Albuquerque/Santa Fe, Sacramento, Salt Lake City, Denver and these international countries/regions Luxembourg, Iceland, Hungary, Kazakhstan, Slovenia, Netherlands, Greece, Puerto Rico, Denmark, Belgium, Croatia, Germany, Turkey, Sweden, Ireland | What Places In The World Match Your Personality?Powered by CityCulture.org
25 |
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| How to Build Robot Squid |
[Jul. 30th, 2005|07:58 pm] |
Have you ever wanted to build a robot squid??? WELL HERE IS HOW!!!
Step 1) Order ROBOT SQUID Set.
Step 2) Assemble ROBOT SQUID set.
Step 3) Do whatever it is that you do with Robot Squid.
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3333333333333333333333333333
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3000000011111111111100000003
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| A DISCOVERY! |
[Jul. 28th, 2005|11:43 pm] |
OMG I FOUND IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ON ACCIDENT TOO!!!!!!!!
THIS IS UTTERLY AMAZING!!!
When I was young I saw this movie about this guy who found these sunglasses that let him see aliens right??? BUT I NEVER KNEW WHAT MOVIE IT WAS!!! UNTIL!!!! I stumbled across it in Netflix while looking for movies.
The movie is called "They Live" directed by none other then my beloved John Carpenter.
I've even referenced this movie once or twice recently as it has continually haunted me as to what movie it was.
I'm glad I can now sleep happily with another case closed. |
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| I've seen these around... |
[Jul. 10th, 2005|02:20 pm] |
I've seen these around more then just a few places so I decided to grab one.
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 6th, 2005|03:09 pm] |
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Surveys are for vinegaroons. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 5th, 2005|06:39 am] |
*Time started: 6:16 AM
*Name: Jacob
*Single or Taken: single
*Sex: dood
*Birthday: Moon
*Sign: Cat
*Siblings: Moose
*Hair color: dark brown
*Eye color: blue, but i thought they were hazel at one time...
*Shoe size: /shrugs
*Height: I have no idea.
*Innie or Outie: It points to the in.
*What are you wearing right now: A duck suit.
*Righty or lefty: Neither. Ducks have wings.
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~Relationships~
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*Who are your closest friends?: All of them
*Do you have a bf or gf: No
*Best place to go for a date: The duck farm.
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*Where is your fav place to shop: i dont shop
*Do you have any tattoos or piercings?: none
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favs
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*Color: Green and dark colors in general.
*Number(s): 8
*Food: Cereal.
*Boys name: Alabaster
*Girls name: Alabaster-Blue
*Subject in school: History
*Animal: Chinchillas, Dogs and Haplos
*Drink: Water
*Celebrity: Christian Bale
*Sport: Sports can go to hell.
*Veggie: Corn?
*Fruit: Nearly all.
*Fast food place: I dont like fast food much, Wendy's or Taco Bell
*Place to visit: The bathroom
*Month: The last 3 and the first 2 or 3
*Juice: Orange juice followed closely by Apple Juice
*Finger: All.
*Ice Cream: Mint Chocolate Chip / Precans pralin.
*Breakfast: Cereal
*Perfume/Cologne: None.
*Favorite cartoon character: Pinky and The Brain
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Have you ever?
------------------------------------------------------------------
*Given anyone a bath: I give ducks baths.
*Bungee jumped: nevar
*Made yourself throw-up: yes
*Gone skinny dipping: nevar
*Been in the opposite sex's bathroom: maybe, not sure.
*Eaten a dog biscuit: I don't think it was a biscuit.
*Put your tongue on a frozen pole: Not yet.
*Loved someone that made you cry: Alabama.
*Played truth or dare: Ya
*Been in a physical fight: I pvp all the time.
*Been in a police car: Ya, but it was show and tell.
*Been on a plane: ya
*Been in a sauna: Ya, I pee'd on the coals too.
*Been in a hot tub: Ya
*Swam in the ocean: Unfortunatly I did. I hate the ocean. Lakes for the win.
*Fallen asleep in school: Practically everyday for one semester.
*Ever had a sex dream?: Word
*Broken someone's heart: I ripped out my own heart and ate it so no one would try to come and steal it in the night to gain my powers. After I ripped it out I replaced it with a robot heart thus completeing the transformation.
*Cried when someone died: No. Wait. I cried when my cat died in second grade.
*Flashed someone: Don't believe so.
*Lied: Yes
*Laughed so hard you fell off your chair: Maybe
*Saved e-mails: Why delete emails when you have gmail?!
*Wished you were someone else: No, but maybe wished I was in their place.(That's not the same thing is it?)
*Wished you were a member of the opposite sex: No
*Made out with JUST a friend?: No
*Been rejected?: Sapped girls don't say no.
*Been in love?: Once. I don't know why the farmers named that one...
*Used someone: I use ducks all the time.
*Been cheated on?: Ducks dont cheat, they get even.
*Done something you regret?: Not going for that goose.
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First Thing That Comes to Mind
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*Red: Green
*Blue: Bars
*Happy: Jacks
*Autumn: orange
*Cow: Man
*Greenland: Iceland
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random…
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*Your good luck charm: Luck isn't a stat in WoW
*Stupidest thing you have ever done: A Turkey.
*Your most prized possession: My box of stuff.
*Last thing you ate: Cereal
*Fave song: Faggot, Dickface, Bitches, Masturbates. Actually they aren't favorites but I really like Mindless Self Indulgence =O (been listening to them all night dood!)
*Best Thing that has happened to you this week?: i really haven't been able to be bored
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have you had…?
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*Chicken pox: Ya, and Duck Pox
*Sore Throat: Yes'sir
*Cold: Ya
*Stitches: No, but I bet that duck needed some.
*Bloody nose: No.
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do you?
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*Believe in love at first sight: Not sure.
*Enjoy parks: Love them.
*Like picnics: I dont know, if they are anythign like Charlie's barbeque i woudl love them.
*Like school: Yes I do.
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Who
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*Who is the last person that called you: *thinks* Eamonn probably.
*Makes you laugh the most: All of them.
*Makes you smile: All of them.
*Can make you feel better no matter what: All of them.
*You hugged?: All of them.
*Massaged you: All of them.
*You Kissed?: Duck.
*you Hooked up with? A Duck.
*Is the last person you yelled at: The duck farmers.
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Do You/Are You...
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*Do you like yourself: Ya
*Do you get along with your family: Word
*Do you do drugs?: No. sXe
*Do you color your hair: Nevar
*Do you like peircings below the waist?: Negative.
*Habla español?: Not really.
*Stolen anything ever?: Yes, when I was a youngin.
*Obsessive: Roffle. I'm not sure. Maybe about afew things.
*Anorexic: No.
*Depressed?: No.
*Suicidal?: No.
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Final Questions
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In the opposite sex...
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*Cute and mysterious or wild and sexy: Wild and sexy is how I prefer my ducks.
*Dressy or casual: the usual
*Dark or blonde hair: Dark.
*Long or short hair: whatever looks best <--- true that dood.
*Curly or straight hair: Ducks have feathers.
*Dark or light eyes: I SEARCH FOR A CHINESE GIRL WITH GREEN EYES SO I MAY MARRY HER AND LIFE MY CURSE. Other then that, no.
*Long or short nails: Recently I learned long finger nails freak me the hell out.
*Hat or no hat: I like girls to wear hats. All the time. They should constantly be wearing hats. I don't tell people about this often but I was engaged a few months back and I was having a secret wedding but I had to say no when she showed up to the alter not wearing a hat. What a slut bitch. Come on. I just had to say "No." What a stupid question this is the gayest quiz evar.
*Good or bad: fuck you
*Jewelery or none: i like it when the farmers leave the ID collars on them
*Tall or short: Not above knee level, they get too fiesty.
*Pants or dress: None.
*Tan or fair: faggot
*Freckles or none: fuck you
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*What do you notice first about a girl/boy: Their quack
*Shy or outgoing: moose
*Dimples: alabaster
*What do you like the most in a girl/boy: baby bearing hips so I can perpetuate teh species of duck-men.
*what time is it now: 6:38 AM, Faggot. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 30th, 2005|01:11 am] |
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HICCUPS MAKE ME FEEL LIKE AN ALIEN IS INSIDE MY BODY AND IT IS TRYING TO JUMP OUT BUT MY BODY WON'T ALLOW IT! ='( |
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| Xanga to LJ post conversion. |
[Jun. 26th, 2005|12:55 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Down South Alligator - Alligator Nate and the Alligator Farm | ] |
ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
So the other day I was flying a kite [this is a lie].
It is 12:34, I have had few hours of sleep. BUT WHY DO I WAKE???
For no better reason then to bitch about it here on xanga.
OR! Maybe the damn phone rang and woke me up and couldn't get back to sleep.
If the much beloved Ciscocat was working properly I would make a post.
ABOUT WHAT???
Thuggin'
That's what.
Punk gangsta
I gonna fuck you up dawg
DiddlyDiddlyDoo
Jack White eeerrrrrilllulluuyyyy reminds me of Michael Jackson.
Anyone agree?
Google Jack White and just take a gander at those hoooooootttt piiiicccs.
OMGOMGOMGOMGOGMOGMOGMG
I bet Jack White is MJ right? You see, its like an alter ego.
LIKE BATMAN!
Man, speaking of batman, that reminds me of a dream.
I had this dream i was batman.
And for whatever reason I thought I was being followed or something.
Is this writing style of putting a sentence then pressing enter and making a gap as if this was an epic poem that Homer or some Greek fag (WOMEN ARE FOR BABIES MEN ARE FOR PLEASURE??!?! FUCKING GREEKS!)
anyways.
I think I was asking you a question on if something were gay?
I will answer this question.
It is gay.
The End.
[That was a lie.]
Limmericks until I spy.
----------------------------------------
Space Rocket in the sky.
Why do you always cry?
Do you need a boat?
I would give you mine but it doesn't float.
Try to use it and you may die!
Monkey Monkey on the wall.
What would happen if you fall?
Would you break a bone?
Would you call me on the phone?
Monkey Monkey, you're such a doll.
Monkey Monkey why do you masturbate?
Is it depression you alleviate?
Maybe you were ganked.
By a 60 rogue you were shaked.
He probably used a 5 point evicerate.
12:48
Tick Tock
Clock Clock
Who's that over there?
Is that Shaft with no hair?
Nyga be pullin' out his Glock Glock.
A robot man.
With no plan.
He rides his horse.
With unholy force.
Until a mage polymorphes him off his mount, frost nova, cone of cold, cold snap, frost nova, cone of cold, fire blast, blink, ice bolt, ice bolt, fire blast, ice barrier, ice bolt, ice bolt, fire blast. MAGE FTW BO-DAN!
The End. |
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| Frontin' |
[Jun. 20th, 2005|07:55 am] |
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Don't be Frontin' |
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| To my homies in jail. |
[Jun. 11th, 2005|06:09 pm] |
Once there was a man who had no legs.
He begged and begged all day.
But no matter how much he begged.
He would have no legs. |
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| A dream!!! |
[May. 7th, 2005|03:05 pm] |
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i had this weird dream where there were the world was ending (except things seemed to be happening in space) and there was this team of people coming around finishing everything off and blowing things up. We had some sorta time machine (by we I mean me and Slema Blair and when we were turning the machine on and about to go (we had no control over where and when it would take us except we knew that it would take us back VERY LONG AGO) I realized that this was how "everything started" we were the start of human kind (ignore time traveling snafus that this creates, its a f'ing dream) and that we have faced this moment who knows how many times before and we KNEW the safe bet was that we would go back in time and restart mankind but I also knew that we intended for when this moment came around again that I expected myself to try something diffrent but trying something diffrent could end everything. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 3rd, 2005|10:05 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | JERRY CANTRELL!!! - My Song | ] |
There once was a robot named Eric. Eric walked into the ocean and rusted to death because he had a shitty name like Eric.
Moral?
Don't name robots human names. |
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| Vim |
[May. 2nd, 2005|12:15 pm] |
vam
bim
bam. |
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| A fond memory of long ago. |
[Apr. 30th, 2005|02:39 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  chipper | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Franz Ferdinand (I'm Indie as hell apparently) -Jacqueline | ] |
I remember this time a long time ago when I was probably 5 or so and for whatever reason my family was eating at Chilis. It was dessert time and it came to my order, I ordered an ice cream but I screwed up in my order and said 'strawberry in the middle' when I meant to say 'cherry on top' but being so young I also requested a cherry on top. And to my utter surprise? They put a strawberry in the middle along with a cherry on top.
In conclusion: screwed up orders create life long memories, and Chilis is pretty cool too I suppose. |
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